The Sixties are OVER, People!! Snap Out Of It!
I don’t know if it’s a California thing or what, or a musician thing or a hippie wannabee thing but let’s get this straight okay? The Sixties are over, gone, kaput. In fact, as much as I hate to admit it, it’s going on almost 50 years ago since the 60’s. I am so sick of all you people in your 50’s and even 60’s!! talking about it and identifying yourselves with it. In no other era, not even the Depression, do I hear people talk about a time with such proclivity. Okay, I get it, free love, drugs, rock ‘n roll, pookah beads, whatever. Fine, it was your youth, you had a good time, but really, do you need to constantly identify yourself with that era in every conversation, in every breath, in every action you take NOW?
I came of age in the 70’s. Do you hear me talkin’ about the 70’s? No. And there’s quite a lot I could identify myself with, such as: The Partridge Family. They were one of the pinnacle bands of the 70’s. The Beatles had nothing on these guys. I mean, there wasn’t one David Cassidy in the bunch. Or Donny Osmond, or HR Puffenstuff…I could go on. Then there was Elton John, Bruce Springsteen and Billy Joel. I spent my life and a goodly amount of dinero buying concert tickets and records of those guys. Yes, I said records, the vinyl, the large round discs you had to play on a record player, a turntable, not for scratching, with a diamond head needle that had nothing to do with Hawaii. Do I listen to these guys now? Not really. I still enjoy listening to them and infrequently I’ll buy a CD if something new comes out that I think I might enjoy but do I dedicate shrines to them? Do I stop traffic if I see a mural in a shop window or some other silly thing, like a dish or a halter top or a key chain? Do I assume everyone I’m with will have the same enthusiasm I will for these people? No! I consider them part of the landscape of my youth and I have fond memories of seeing them through binoculars through much of my adolescence and raising my fist in the air four balconies up while caulking my nosebleed with a Kleenex but nevertheless they are just that, fond memories. I don’t need to drag them around with me and pull out wallet size photos to show everyone. I haven’t bought an Elton John album since Blue Moves and if you can remember that two record album then (a) you were a true Elton John fan and (b) you’ll know why you stopped buying his albums after that. That and the fact that he turned out to be gay. Not that I’m against it, and not that we didn’t all know anyway, with the crazy costumes and all, but dang if he didn’t rock out with the best of the heterosexual rock and roll men out there. And he was kinda cute on some of those album covers. Although my heart did really go out for Bernie Taupin but I was rather mercurial in my youth anyway. One week Bernie, next week Redford, week after that…Paul Michael Glaser…I was a pop culture crush slut in my day.
Hell, the 70’s were about those concept albums and lyrics and liner notes. Record albums were a work of art. Shelling out almost $12 for a two disc set was an investment. That’s what I remember of the 70’s. I remember my older cousin working for Sony at one point or was it Magnavox, anyway, he brought out a compact disc and had us listen to it over my Uncle’s house one day. He said, these are the wave of the future. No more records. And I covered my ears!! I refused to believe him! No more records??!!! No way. Where was the artistry in a CD cover, where do you put the lyrics? How can I lift up the needle to skip around to a song I like? Stuff like that. But, hey, now all I have are CDs. You don’t see me running around with a bunch of vinyl records, pullin’ one out and accosting everyone with it so as to relive the 70’s every day, do you? NO! Because it was 30 YEARS AGO!!
So please stop with the Beatles, Woodstock, beads, “I’m just an old hippie” crap. And cut your hair for godssakes! You’re 55, what, 60, maybe already? I hate to break the news to ya, but you don’t look like a hippie. You look like a homeless guy or a guy stuck in the 60’s who needs a bath. Stop replaying old Zappa tapes and throwing your fist in the air. We get it already you had a good time, you got high, zonked, laid, whatever. It’s called your youth, your adolescence, maybe your 20’s but it’s back then, not NOW!! Get over it because we’re bored with you. We don’t get it, we weren’t there and any attempts to relive it with us will make us roll our eyes is exasperation, disgust and annoyance. And anyway, aren’t most of those people dead, from drug overdoses? This is what you called fun?!! This is what you look back on with fond remembrance? Take a bath! And hey, half of the Beatles are dead and one of them just got taken by a blond half his age who looked like his first wife, rest her soul. Maybe if he hadn’t been living in the past and found someone his own age with gray or brunette hair, he would have fared better. So see, get up, dust yourself off and realize the good times are now, today, in the 21st century.
Now let me just take this plastic comb with a handle out of my backpocket and give my feather-cut a comb through. My hair stylist keeps telling me to get a different style but no way, I want to look like my high school graduation picture. I was really cute then. I wonder if you can get CDs of The Partridge Family?
I came of age in the 70’s. Do you hear me talkin’ about the 70’s? No. And there’s quite a lot I could identify myself with, such as: The Partridge Family. They were one of the pinnacle bands of the 70’s. The Beatles had nothing on these guys. I mean, there wasn’t one David Cassidy in the bunch. Or Donny Osmond, or HR Puffenstuff…I could go on. Then there was Elton John, Bruce Springsteen and Billy Joel. I spent my life and a goodly amount of dinero buying concert tickets and records of those guys. Yes, I said records, the vinyl, the large round discs you had to play on a record player, a turntable, not for scratching, with a diamond head needle that had nothing to do with Hawaii. Do I listen to these guys now? Not really. I still enjoy listening to them and infrequently I’ll buy a CD if something new comes out that I think I might enjoy but do I dedicate shrines to them? Do I stop traffic if I see a mural in a shop window or some other silly thing, like a dish or a halter top or a key chain? Do I assume everyone I’m with will have the same enthusiasm I will for these people? No! I consider them part of the landscape of my youth and I have fond memories of seeing them through binoculars through much of my adolescence and raising my fist in the air four balconies up while caulking my nosebleed with a Kleenex but nevertheless they are just that, fond memories. I don’t need to drag them around with me and pull out wallet size photos to show everyone. I haven’t bought an Elton John album since Blue Moves and if you can remember that two record album then (a) you were a true Elton John fan and (b) you’ll know why you stopped buying his albums after that. That and the fact that he turned out to be gay. Not that I’m against it, and not that we didn’t all know anyway, with the crazy costumes and all, but dang if he didn’t rock out with the best of the heterosexual rock and roll men out there. And he was kinda cute on some of those album covers. Although my heart did really go out for Bernie Taupin but I was rather mercurial in my youth anyway. One week Bernie, next week Redford, week after that…Paul Michael Glaser…I was a pop culture crush slut in my day.
Hell, the 70’s were about those concept albums and lyrics and liner notes. Record albums were a work of art. Shelling out almost $12 for a two disc set was an investment. That’s what I remember of the 70’s. I remember my older cousin working for Sony at one point or was it Magnavox, anyway, he brought out a compact disc and had us listen to it over my Uncle’s house one day. He said, these are the wave of the future. No more records. And I covered my ears!! I refused to believe him! No more records??!!! No way. Where was the artistry in a CD cover, where do you put the lyrics? How can I lift up the needle to skip around to a song I like? Stuff like that. But, hey, now all I have are CDs. You don’t see me running around with a bunch of vinyl records, pullin’ one out and accosting everyone with it so as to relive the 70’s every day, do you? NO! Because it was 30 YEARS AGO!!
So please stop with the Beatles, Woodstock, beads, “I’m just an old hippie” crap. And cut your hair for godssakes! You’re 55, what, 60, maybe already? I hate to break the news to ya, but you don’t look like a hippie. You look like a homeless guy or a guy stuck in the 60’s who needs a bath. Stop replaying old Zappa tapes and throwing your fist in the air. We get it already you had a good time, you got high, zonked, laid, whatever. It’s called your youth, your adolescence, maybe your 20’s but it’s back then, not NOW!! Get over it because we’re bored with you. We don’t get it, we weren’t there and any attempts to relive it with us will make us roll our eyes is exasperation, disgust and annoyance. And anyway, aren’t most of those people dead, from drug overdoses? This is what you called fun?!! This is what you look back on with fond remembrance? Take a bath! And hey, half of the Beatles are dead and one of them just got taken by a blond half his age who looked like his first wife, rest her soul. Maybe if he hadn’t been living in the past and found someone his own age with gray or brunette hair, he would have fared better. So see, get up, dust yourself off and realize the good times are now, today, in the 21st century.
Now let me just take this plastic comb with a handle out of my backpocket and give my feather-cut a comb through. My hair stylist keeps telling me to get a different style but no way, I want to look like my high school graduation picture. I was really cute then. I wonder if you can get CDs of The Partridge Family?
posted by Maria @ 7:17 PM
0 Comments:
Post a Comment
<< Home